Thursday, October 13, 2005

Say it ain't so.....PLEASE.....say it ain't so......

I beg of you who work in the fashion industry to please reconsider your decision to bring back the gaucho pants. I can't think of anything much worse than these except maybe culottes.

These things - a cross between a pair of pants and a skirt - have got to be one of the most hideous items of fashion that came out of the 70's. I remember I had a pair or two of them and I avoided wearing them at all costs (hey - I was still a child without much say-so when it came to clothing purchases). They remind me of how my "I can barely wear a size zero" sister looked when she put on a pair of my shorts!!

OK - some people CAN pull off wearing these things. In my most humble opinion the only accessory I can think of that remotely compliments these is a nice pair of tall boots like these. But please don't wear them with these - I don't think these boots are good for anything but dog-sledding, hunting polar bears or while scoring a half-caff double latte' in your favorite bedsheet like our favorite mom, Britney.

I admit that maybe some of my animosity toward gauchos and culottes stems from the fact that I have neither the right type of thighs to pull off such an outfit - nor the calves to wear the tall boots. I like to eat - and I prefer to digest my meals thankyouverymuch.

Who is guilty cuplrit who decided to resurrect this hideous frock??? Was Donatella Versace going through some boxes in her brother's attic and found these stuffed away in a corner and thought, "I'll bet if I just slap the Versace label on these they will sell like hotcakes!"? Did Stella McCartney think, "They were good enough for my mom - and she was a famous musician - then they are are good enough for me!" ? Do they bring back warm fuzzy memories of little Isaac Mizrahi running around in his Mommy's clothes?

I have never claimed to be a fashionista. I think that those who get orgasmic over haute couteur (high fashion), hang on every word of the top designers, and are almost spastic about having name-brand design labels attached to their clothing and apparel are above-the-neck paraplegics.

But GAUCHOS???? C'mon.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Introverts Unite!

You know......some days it pays to be an introvert. Today was no exception.

I have a couple of co-workers who are always at each others' throats. Not in a bad way - kind of in a "mom, he's touching me!" way. You know, the types who are always picking at each other but are the best of friends. They are truly funny to listen to - and I hear almost everything because one of the ladies' desk is just outside of my office.

Today, they were both out there doing their usual stuff.
J: "C...look at this for me...can you -"
C: "WHY are you bothering me???"

I look at my office-mate and say, "T - the kids are fighting again." Then a moment of incorrigible-ness overtakes me. I sling open the office door and say to both of them, "Don't make me HURT you!!" The look on their faces was priceless. I dare say it's the first time either of them have been rendered speechless.

I close the door and notice T writhing on the floor in a fit of laughter. I hear through the door, "Damn......Seraphim has crossed over to the dark side......" Minutes later, after the shock value wore off, we were all laughing.